All kinds of fun.

Woot! Well things on my Power Rangers site seem to be having a bit of an issue behind the scenes. The staff is up in arms and one of the staff members has the intent to quit the staff. I can't say I blame him. He's a nice guy and I can't really judge someone for choosing to stick to his ethics. I now know one half of the story but that isn't always enough to make a judgement. In fact, I'm not quite sure why I'm learning any of this at all as I'm a lowly member. Of course he may just be of the school of thought that I'm someone he can confide in...which is an honor really if you think about it. Whatever is going on, I hope it clears up before I feel a need to step in.

I made a new character for that site...or rather I rehashed an old character. I get Lianna Benu now who is the healer of the Power Rangers. She is only a field medic and loses her power if she intentionally causes anyone harm. This should be rather interesting, I think. I might be able to run the Feng plot with her at some point. I'll have to ask L about it. My other character, Shayla, seems to be doing well. She's something of a spazz though. I don't mind. I think it's adorable.

Adam still hasn't talked further about the therapy idea. I'm rather concerned about it I suppose but the subject may just make him feel uncomfortable about it. I think I'm gonna talk to Sarah about it and see what she thinks. I hope she doesn't think I'm trying to just get attention. Bleh who knows. I get to hang out with her and GW tomorrow. I'm looking forward to it. It's been a while since I've been able to hang out with Sarah. I've been getting concerned about her. She and Thurman have been having a spat lately. Sarah doesn't think she's friends with Thurman anymore. I hope everything clears up. This is not something I want at the gaming table Saturday night.

I promised a friend of mine a few months ago that I'd go visit him in Winnipeg. I've discussed it with Adam (who gave his usual 'we'll see' answer) and have started a jar for all of our change. We have about a year and a half to get the funds we need to get there and back. I'm thinking if it turns out that Adam can't go, I'm going to ask my brother to tag along. He'd like that and Adam can trust James to not let anything happen to me. I never thought it'd be such a great idea to have my brother be taller than me.

Cleaning house has reached a slump. I'm such a failure as a house wife. I hope I can learn to straighten up before it's too late. Sarah says our house isn't filthy. It's just overly cluttered. I'm inclined to believe her but there's always so much crap I just 'can't live without' you know?

I should figure out how to get a passport some time soon. I think I need it for airline travel to Canada. I'm so looking forward to this trip. Andrew (the canadian friend) has been one of my best friends for almost nine years now and I've never met him in person. Strange how the internet age works, isn't it? How you can be such great friends with someone you've never actually met. Several months ago, he invited me to join his gaming group which is held over Skype. Adam and I are enjoying it and it's nice to find a group that puts so much work into their games.

They've even convinced me to run a game. It wasn't hard, really. I'm running one on the system Rifts. I have a strategy for how I'm going about it but no clear ideas just yet. I really need to read over the rule book.

Well That's about it for now. Be prepared for in the future I'll probably be explaining some of my rp characters both tabletop and forum. They're important to me so you get to hear about them. Until then, if anyone is actually out there, G'night!

God Save Us From The Queen
-Sam

I think there's something wrong with m

I don't know. I've been thinking about it for a while and I think I should see a psychiatrist. I'm just not like other people...not even in the melancholy teenage way. I mean I don't think I'm all there.

I feel guilt all of the time...and I don't even know why. Part of me just feels like I'm always doing something wrong. I don't shower as often as I should. I know that I should. I'm thinking about it. I should. There's just always something more important I need to do. I can't keep the house clean. Not sure why. I know I should just pick up after myself but again, something else always gets in the way. Then there's the fact I can never quite get my thoughts organized.

In fact that's probably why I don't have any comments. My entries must be so scattered.

Adam doesn't like the idea of it. He doesn't think there's anything wrong with me. He's also afraid that some professional is going to tell me that it's all his fault. How can he think something like that? I appreciate Adam not thinking there's something wrong with me but what if there's something wrong? What if I really do need help? Am I to sit and let his insecurities stop me from doing so?

He doesn't even want to talk about it. What am I supposed to do?

I dunno. I'm just being self concious.

God Save Us From The Queen
-Sam

I should be doing something productive...

Yep. Bored again. Adam is off doing that training thing he spoke of yesterday and so I am stuck here at home. It's raining so I can't even go to the grocery store and feel useful. I should get working on the house. There's still laundry to do. Rooms to clean. A closet to get hopelessly lost in. I am not looking forward to that closet. My friend Thurman is supposed to be coming by today. Most of my other friends are either working or can't drive.

Went wandering around a Power Rangers role play site I'm a member of. I only have one character there but I love her so it's okay. I'm considering another one but I'm waiting for a friend to sign on so I can bounce ideas off of him. Oh. There he is. Never mind that bit. Things are going well but I've only been back for a few days. There was some drama a few months ago that I'm hoping has completely blown over. I won't be going into details but suffice to say, I'm probably going to decline any offer of a staff position I receive. The admin and I get along much better when I'm just a member. Maybe she just likes my 'I don't criticize if you don't ask me to' policy as a member. I can get rather controlling as a fellow admin. I wonder if that had anything to do with why the drama started in the first place. I don't know.

There's a member there I don't get along with. She's stabbed me in the back in the past. I'm not the only one that doesn't want to have anything to do with her. Why the admin does is completely beyond me. I promised I wouldn't start anything though. It's not even going to be any of that passive aggressive 'well she better not start anything with me' bull shit. I won't act against her even then.

What the hell is up with passive aggression anyways? It always struck me as 'well I'm going to sit here and pout while you continue on clueless about how mad I am!' like it's actually going to accomplish anything. Instead it makes the person look like a pouting four year old. When someone has a problem, they should address it directly instead of sulking and hoping someone will ask them what their problem is.

Well that's all I have at the moment. If I get bored again I might post another message today.

God Save Us From The Queen
-Sam.

Evil Queen is Mostly Evil

Hello and welcome to my first semi serious blog. I'm kind of new at this so bear with me.

My name is Sam. That's short for Samantha and I'm 23 years old. I'm married with no children and I live in the ass crack of Kentucky. I am an online role player. I am a costumer. I am a LARPer. And I am pretty damned bored.

My husband Adam is perfect. He has a great job which is a feat in of itself in this economy and he utterly adores me. I think he is the best thing to ever happen to me and I'm glad to spend my life with him.

Since my husband has a great job, I have undertaken the time honored role as house wife. I take care of the house and I am happy to do so. I'm not very good at it though as I have horrendous organization skills. I'm learning I suppose. Recently I have taken on a good portion of our laundry. This is a big deal considering I usually wash Adam's clothes for work about an hour before he has to leave which means his dad, who he car pools with, always gets cranky. Father in law gets cranky, husband gets cranky. The day just gets better from there. I have done a total of twenty loads and there are still a few more.

I told you. I am -way- behind.

Dishes are something else I need to get better at. I've gone from 'duck and cover' to 'slaying the beast weekly'. This isn't very helpful I suppose as there are still things moving and I'm not entirely sure how they exist.

I've also cleaned the bathroom which means I organized everything, cleaned every surface, and threw away all of the crap we didn't need. Apparently the medicine cabinet isn't the ideal place for medication. The steam and moisture in the air from showering can have bad effects on the medications stored in there. It looks like my hair products can reclaim their rightful place and all medication can go in the cabinet above the stove.

There may be hope for me yet.

My next task gets to be the guest closet. I live in a single wide trailer and the fact that I have two closets at all is nothing short of a blessing. The guest closet has an added bonus of being a walk-in. That's great despite the fact that because of this, the closet takes up half of the guest room. What do I care? I'm not sleeping in there and a guest is never supposed to be too comfortable in a guest room. They wind up staying long than you want them.

Tomorrow, or rather I should say later today, Adam gets to go to work for special training. Special as in now they get to expect more out of him but don't have to give him a raise. At least he gets paid for it which adds another eleven hours to his pay check that he otherwise wouldn't have gotten. With any luck that can go toward salvaging our dwindling bank account. I certainly hope so.

That's all I really have to say now. Thanks for reading.

God save us from the queen,
-Sam